How to increase your resilience
What is resilience?
Resilience is the ability to cope with and bounce back from traumatic or difficult events and situations in our lives. Some people seem to be born more resilient and able to cope with whatever life throws at them. The good news for the rest of us is that by practicing certain behaviours, thoughts and actions you can increase your resilience.
Having resilience doesn’t mean you won’t have to face setbacks and challenges, but it will make it easier for you to deal with them when they happen.
How to become more resilient
Develop a strong support network
Having a strong and supportive network you can call upon in times of stress can help make you more resilient. It’s much easier to deal with life’s problems when you have someone in your life that you can turn talk to about what’s happening, who will listen without judgement, provide you with moral support and help you work through solutions.
It’s also important to build relationships at work. People who have strong connections at work tend to be better able to cope with stress and more happier in their jobs.
Believe in yourself
A sense of self-worth and believing you have the skills to deal with the situation can increase your resilience. Replace negative comments in your head with positive ones like “I can do this.”
View yourself as a fighter rather than a victim.
Keep a positive outlook
Staying optimistic during traumatic or stressful events can be hard, but maintaining a hopeful outlook is an important part of building resilience.
Focus on all the things in your life which are going well and the things you are grateful for.
Remind yourself that the situation, no matter how difficult, is only temporary.
Try to maintain perspective. Even though the situation may feel overwhelming right now, it may not have much impact on your life in the long term. Try to imagine yourself in a few years’ time. Will you still be focused on this issue? Will it still be impacting your life in a negative way. Often the answer will be no.
Look after yourself physically
It’s important when going through a stressful situation not to neglect your physical well being. Not getting enough sleep, not eating well or skipping exercise can reduce your physical resilience and make the mental impact even more difficult to deal with.
Find a Sense of Purpose
Finding a sense of purpose can help build resilience. Do something that gives you a sense of purpose and accomplishment every day. Feeling you have meaning in your life and help improve your overall health and wellbeing as well as your resilience.
Be flexible
Being flexible is an important part of resilience. Accepting that change is a part of life makes challenges less daunting and means you can face them with less anxiety.
Take action
Ignoring the problem and hoping it will go away can make it worse and prolong the stress. Be pro-active and take action. This helps you feel that you are in control of the situation.
Set realistic goals to solve the problem. If the problem seems insurmountable try to break it down into smaller more manageable pieces and think about the steps you can take to solve it or to make the situation less stressful.
Focus on the things that you can directly impact, and try to accept the things that are outside your control.
Remind yourself of a difficult situation or event you’ve faced in the past and that you were able to get through it. Think about the strategies that you employed then that helped.
Try to take small steps each day. It can take time to recover from a crisis or traumatic life event. Be encouraged by the steps you’ve taken and the progress you’ve made rather than focusing on what you still need to do.
Know when to get help
An important part of being resilient is knowing when to seek help. If you are really struggling or just don’t know where to start in dealing with the situation, don’t hesitate to reach out to your doctor or one of these organisations:
